How was this week different from all other weeks?

“Did I tell you what happened this week?”

“What?”

“I stumped a rabbi.”

“What?”

“I stumped a rabbi.” (Pause.) “You don’t seem that excited.”

“I don’t understand what you’re saying to me.”

“I asked my Jewish friend if she could eat oatmeal on Shabbat.” (Pause.) “You know? Like, would it break the rules to make instant oatmeal–using the hot water that she would already have going for tea and whatnot. (Pause.) ‘Cause you can pour cereal, but you can’t cook. So I was just wondering where oatmeal fell on the spectrum. (Pause.) It’s a good question.”

“OK.”

“Don’t you want to know the answer?”

“I guess.”

“Well, she didn’t know, so she asked her rabbi–like a very important rabbi in New York City.”

“And?”

“He didn’t know. Well, he said he’d get back to her.” (Pause.) “I stumped a learned rabbi with a question about Shabbat!” (Pause.) “You don’t seem as excited as I am.”

“Maybe the rabbi just didn’t want to talk about it.”

“What?”

“Just saying.”